Election Stress and Polarization: How to Cope and Cultivate Peace

Posted: October 29, 2024

Picture this scenario. You’re out to lunch with co-workers one week before the presidential election. You cover all of the small talk pleasantries, and after a while you start to wonder, “Will anyone dare to acknowledge the pressure cooker that our nation is sitting in amidst the uncertainty of the outcome and aftermath on November 5? You are curious about how they are voting but are afraid to ask because of the potential for a heated discussion or uncomfortable tension that could negatively affect morale and working relationships. So you decide to avoid political discussions, as does everyone else, and you all carry on as usual.

You feel pretty at peace until that evening when you’re on social media. An acquaintance whom you respect posts something political revealing that they’re not voting like you. You move from disappointment to frustration and start to think, “How could they possibly want that for our country? They must be deceived, and now they’re influencing others who might fall for that deceit!” Do you comment on the post, or leave it? The answer to that might depend on how angry you’re feeling, or whether you had a glass of wine after work. Let’s look at how each path plays out. Path A: You meticulously craft a response and comment on their post, then within minutes a debate is sparked that now involves at least 10 people and keeps you engaged (and enraged) for the rest of your evening, preventing you from getting good sleep. Path B: You decide not to comment, but your mind starts spiraling into all of the catastrophic possibilities for our country if this other candidate wins. You then look for “support” for your ideas by Googling the topic and browsing stories that add fuel to your fear. You decide to share those stories with “safe” people whom you know think like you and are voting like you. As you engage with those people you neglect giving attention to those living with you. You’re also too wound up to relax at bedtime, and when you do fall asleep you have nightmares about those catastrophes that you imagined and wake up anxious.

I’d be willing to bet that within the past 6 months you have found yourself somewhere in this story. In the American Psychological Association’s 2024 Stress in America survey, 77% of U.S. adults said the future of our nation was a significant source of stress in their lives, citing problems such as lost sleep, shortened tempers, and obsessive thoughts (Stress in America 2024, APA). While there is a degree of this type of stress every election cycle, the research reflects the intensity of this one, and it’s taking a toll on our mental and physical health. In 2016, 52% of those surveyed reported significant stress related to the presidential election- 25% less than now. Sociologists are observing that we are more divided now as a nation than we have been since the Civil War. This election seems to carry a stronger emotional charge of passion for one’s chosen candidate, while carrying an equal charge of hostility and fear towards the other. 74% of survey respondents said they were worried that the election results could lead to violence or that the 2024 election could be the end of democracy in the U.S. (56% of respondents) (Stress in America 2024, APA).

tea and notes for self care

So, what can we do to mitigate this stress and divisiveness? I believe that the process is two-fold: First we implement stress management and self-care strategies to regulate our emotions (tips near the end of this article), and then we bring our grounded self into building and nurturing relationships with those who have different views. The nurturing of those relationships needs to happen face to face, not Facebook to Facebook. Social media only serves to evoke more anger and create more divisiveness when it comes to politics because the algorithms feed people the information that they want to see, creating a sense of tribalism and certainty that their group is right. Our clicks and shares create a demand for biased information. When we sit down with someone over coffee from a stance of curiosity, we have an opportunity to hear how their story informed their beliefs and we begin to see them as more nuanced, and less extreme. There is also an opportunity to find common ground without losing our identity. Rev. Jennifer Bailey ordained minister, public theologian, and national leader in the multi-faith movement for justice said, “Relationships move at the speed of trust; social change moves at the speed of relationships.” The principles of government upon which America was formed honor the holding of tension that is a necessary part of democracy. When talking about stress with my clients, I often use an analogy that in order for a rubber band to be useful, it has to have a degree of tension. Some stress leads to productivity, but too much causes us to break. Similarly, when doing strength training, our muscles don’t get stronger without a force of resistance. Therefore, rather than try to avoid the political tension, we can shift our perspective to see tension and conflict as a catalyst for building strength and effecting change.

To help ground yourself and regulate when election stress gets to you, follow these tips:

Limit social media exposure and find a balance by tuning in when there is something to be done, such as volunteering for an event.
Consider reading rather than watching your news. Scenes and images can bring an emotional charge that could be manipulative.
Get involved in taking political action in a peaceful and constructive way. This includes voting!
Move your body: Physical activity releases pent up cortisol that accumulates when under stress, and joyful movement releases endorphins.
Ask yourself, “How likely is that worst-case scenario? Can I manage to cope with that? What are the kinds of things that I might again have some control over to try to manage a situation that would look like that?"
Spend time in nature and do fun activities with family and friends.
Stay socially connected with supportive people AND don’t avoid those who have different political opinions from you. Having respectful conversations that involve really listening to those who think and feel differently can help us to see our shared humanity and lower the temperature on our feared outcomes.

I was recently inspired by a sermon preached by my pastor, George Stull, who approached rather than avoided this topic of politics and how to pursue peace. I have included a link to the sermon in the footnotes. I agree with his observation that Jesus was both conservative and progressive and placing our hope in one political party is not a firm foundation. I will close by sharing the relevant Scriptures that speak to the calling that Christians have to fulfill the law of love and pursue peace. If you are not a follower of Jesus, the virtues of love and peace will still enrich your life and your relationships. And then maybe the next time you’re out to lunch with coworkers, you can find the courage to connect with respect.

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” -Romans 12:18
“Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.” Romans 13:8

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Election Stress and Polarization: How to Cope and Cultivate Peace

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